I typed this word document Monday night (6/17) for a friend because I didn't
have internet in my apartment or even from the streets and these were
insignificant things I felt I needed to tell. They’re trivial, but I think
having so much to say is a reflection of how much I missed people.
Normally in a conversation we say this much and more and surely, had I
had internet and good timing in the mornings, I would've said all these things. I hope by telling you these things you feel like we've
had something of a conversation. And I’ll keep up the journal when new things
arise and unload them on you occasionally should I never get internet (I got it on Tuesday the 25th of June)
I flew Asiani, which is a Korean airline. There were five
flight attendants and four were young women (very pretty) and one man. They came
out in these real tight dresses for seating us and reading the safety
instructions (not the man). Oh and before they began the safety instructions,
they bowed. Their noses went lower than the arm rests. But after we took off,
they went back to their seats and when the plane wasn't climbing straight up,
they came back and were wearing new outfits! It was just an apron but it seemed
so sudden that they changed. And they didn't just throw it on over the tight
dress.
Along with the bowing, there were some odd Asian things
going on on that flight. They came by with headphone and slippers. Everyone put
the slippers on so I did too. It was great! I always hate wearing shoes when
traveling. My feet need to breathe. But I don’t want everyone to suffer my foot
odor. But these slippers had like odor fighting chemicals or something. Or
maybe everyone’s foot odor just mixed in the air and cancelled each other out.
I don’t know. I’m not a foot odor scientist. Anyway, after that we got a snack
right away. Normally they wait a bit but nope, we got it immediately. And then
after everyone got their snack (just a pack of trail mix or whatever), they
started on dinner! I had steak, which was surprisingly good for airline food. It
was my last Americanish meal, I thought, but nope! Half way through the flight
we got another meal. But after that first steak dinner, they came around with
tea and coffee in actual kettles. Up and down the rows, again and again, they marched asking if anyone had changed their mind. There was a solid two hours of service before
the attendants took a break.
I noticed this not long in: there weren't many people
sleeping, but no one opened the window shutters. They just blocked out the light
so we sat in the dark mostly. It was weird. And I didn't want to be the jackass
who ruined the dark for everyone so I kept mine shut too but peeked out
occasionally because I wanted to see the land below when we flew over Russia,
Japan, and Korea. The little kid in front of me did the same and his mom
snapped at him to close it.
The seats all had clunky, old tablets. They were
touch-screen and you could watch whatever program you wanted as long as it was
available. It had Korean TV, Chinese TV, American TV, Japanese TV and then
movies for each country, games—I played Tetris for a bit— and “exercises” which were
really just massages. I did them but felt ridiculous but they worked so I felt
ridiculous again when I did them again.
The flight from Seattle to Seoul was 12 hours long. I
watched about 5 movies, read, slept, and got up once because the Korean man
next to me was asleep for most of it and I had the window seat. When I went to
the bathroom, I did squats. I’m pretty sure I had a mini-clot blocking an
artery in my butt at one point because there was a sudden pain there. Like I
winced.
The guy next to me must've been farting a lot. Suddenly
there’d just be an awful odor and I’d want to puke. I don’t know what he ate
but I wish he hadn't.
When we started to land, I saw some of the city (mostly
just the airport) and felt really good about it all. Then I saw a hangar that
was all Korean letters. That freaked me out. I expected more English. Is that
ethnocentric? I just figured there’d be a mix, but it’s honestly 75% Korean and
the rest is like Konglish (Korean & English mixed). And I got on the bus to
go to Cheonan where the school is and was trying to stay awake because I was
terrified I’d miss my stop though I had 2 hours before it. And we were
alongside another bus and I saw some other Westerners and people who looked
more Japanese or Chinese than Korean and I thought maybe they’re all feeling
the same things I am right now. A big sense of being lost. And there was a girl
on my bus who I went through the customs line with and she was non-Korean but
Asian and I don’t know why but I wanted to admit to her everything I've just
said and tell her that it’s too bad we speak different languages and we think
everyone looks so different because we're all just feeling the same things
inside. And then I thought, maybe she's just Korean-descended and speaks
perfect English and she'd say something like “I’m from San Francisco, you
jackass.”
Everything is very familiar, even if I feel lost.
Architecture, road signs, how people behave. But it was unsettling when I
realized that. It made me smile but it also felt kind of worse because now I’m
somewhere familiar but completely lost.
I saw a building that had math on it. Or maybe they were
just numbers but it was like in neon letters where some companies put their
names on the building but instead it was math. Or maybe the square meters of
the building that was for sale. I don’t know.
When I got to the Cheonan bus station, the director of my
school wasn't there. She was supposed to pick me up. And I waited. And waited
and waited and waited and then panicked. I was sending out emails, trying to
call the agent who had met me at the airport but she wouldn't answer, I was
looking for the number of the director, I got on Skype, I tried to text, I
walked around the terminal, and I had my two rolling bags with me and I had
gone up a ramp then the ramp down was filthy with people so I just hefted the
bag down the stairs and everyone stared at me, maybe because I was nearly
crying from panic and I was flushed because I had a sweatshirt on even though
it was about 70 and very humid but the bus had been cold and I just hadn't
taken it off yet. Then the director found me and it was a big relief. She and
her husband asked me all about myself. Baseball is huge here. I told them I
liked it, which I do, but mostly to play video games of it. Her husband (I
guess co-director with his wife) likes me because I like baseball and he
offered to take me to a temple next weekend along with the other native
teachers.
There are three other native English speaking teachers. A
Canadian, a Korean-American, and an Australian. The Canadian doesn't give a
fuck. We talk about hockey and he smokes and he thought he’d be sent home his
first week here because we have to get health checks and no one told him that
involved a drug test. I think he had just done marijuana which is legal in Canada but I didn't ask.
Apparently whatever it was didn't show up or exclude him from teaching. He’s
been here since September. I like him but he’s sort of moody. The
Korean-American is a bit of a hardliner. He’s hard to talk to. My first day, I
dressed sharp thinking I was supposed to. You know, a tie, leather belt, dress
shoes, a nice shirt, black silk pants. I looked good (but don’t I always?). And
he came in and asked, “Who died?” It was funny because I was way overdressed but
then I observed his class and he drilled me on the students’ names. I’m still
getting used to the accents and I had already met 50 kids that day so I forgot
his class’s and he tested me about five times then told me I mumble my name. I
don’t know. He’s hard to get along with. But he has a lot of order in his
classroom. The Australian is what I think when I think of Australian guys. He’s
tall, slender and good-looking and just has that cool-guy appearance. He’s very
easy with everyone. You’d never know he was a nerd on the inside. He went to an
internet “bung?” (cafe) just so he could play Starcraft or some online game. He
loaned me his Korean phrasebook now that he’s done with it. He’s already learned
a ton in the month he’s been here. The
native teachers are all about my age. Actually I’m the oldest. Unless Tim is
older (he is). He’s the Korean-American. I only have a few months on the Canadian, but
Korea does age weird. When you’re born, you’re 1. When January 1
comes, your age goes up. So if you’re born on December 31, the next day on
January 1, you are 2 years old though technically you’re less than a week old.
So I’m 25 and since I was born in December, that gives me a whole Korean year
on the Canadian.
The Korean teachers are hard to remember. They’re all
women. I know Michelle because she’s gorgeous and sits next to me. Lucy sits next to me too. Sue is the
head teacher (scary). But there are three others who I just don’t know from one
another. I’ve been introduced like 20 times to everyone but names just slip my head!
There’s a Connie, a Silvia, a Helen but I think Helen left and I’m replacing
her. I don’t know. The Korean teachers are like magic in the classroom. They’ll
poke their heads in occasionally and say a few words in Korean and the kids are
perfect students after that. We asked them what they say and they say all they
say is “What are you doing? What should you be doing?” but there has to be more
to it. But some students won’t listen to even them. Or they will but within a
minute they’re wild again and even the Korean teachers have difficulty with
them. One troublemaker told her Korean teacher that I’m her favorite.
A common greeting in Korean is “Have you had
(breakfast/lunch/dinner)?” and sometimes Koreans will say it in English in the
way you might say “How are you?” and all they expect is “Ne” (Korean for “Yes”)
but the first time I was asked, I didn't know this so I started talking about
what I had and how I’m adjusting to Korean food and the spices and so on and I
got a strange look. It'd be like asking “How are you?” to an acquaintance and
getting a serious response that you’d only really expect from a close friend.
I've been writing a lot.
Not having internet is awful.
I've been exploring the city, just going out and walking.
My first night here, I got in at 9 and was too tired for anything so I just
slept. I got up at 5 the next morning so that night I was too tired to play
badminton with the Canada and Australia. Then Friday they left for Seoul
to go to a concert. They invited me but I didn't have any money and I’m not
looking to spend more than I have to till I get my first paycheck. So I walked around on my own that first
weekend. I just went straight, maybe a circle around the block and went right
back. I found the ATM, luckily, and about 5 barbershops and I made a mental
note of which was closest but when I got back to the apartment, I saw there was
a barbershop right across the street from me. Barbershops have a pole with a
spinning thing inside. It’s very old-timey for Americans to see that. But that pole is important. One pole means it’s a
barbershop. Two poles means it’s a whorehouse. I found a whorehouse. The
windows were dark. I wanted to go in, see what it was like. Was it seedy? Was
it polite? Were the girls pretty? Did they look happy? I don’t even know if
it’s legal but I wouldn't ever go in just out of curiosity and especially not
because I want to be a customer. It wasn't far from my apartment either. I think it was by a grocery store actually. There’s also a mountain right behind the apartment. And a police station down
the street. But apparently this is a crimeless utopia. That’s what Canada told me. He said I could leave a wad of money, a cell phone, my laptop and car
keys out on the street and no one would touch them. Or if they did, they’d take
it to the police station. I don’t know if I believe it, but he said he could
skip through the worst part of Seoul in his underpants at 2 AM and feel safe, albeit
a little ridiculous.
I went into the market and I think I went in the exit but
I couldn't tell. The water here doesn't seem okay to drink in large quantities
and my first night the director took me to buy groceries including bottled
water so I assume it’s the case. But water is like a dollar for 3 liters. I
almost said a gallon but they don’t use gallons and I don’t know how
many liters are in a gallon but I checked the label and it says 3L. I can’t
read the rest of it. I’m trying to learn Korean. I know the letter B. I can say
thank you. That’s it. It’s only been a day though. Anyway, when I went into the
market and went to the cash register, the lady pointed to the screen to tell me
the price which was good but then she asked me something. “Pon seyo?” And I
didn’t know what it meant. And she just stared at me. And she had my money but
didn’t give me my change so I thought she might've been asking if I wanted a
bag. I must be very frustrating for her.
As of Wednesday, I now know the alphabet with a little
difficulty on the w and y vowels. They do it weird. Like there’s a different
letter for wa, wae, wi, we, wo, woe, and wue and wu and the same with y-vowels.
They’re all similar but maybe that’s a hindrance. Like the Y-sounds are a
vertical line with a little dash connected and depending on the sound, all you
do is rotate it so it’s tough to remember which rotation is which letter.
I told you how I was dressed sharply my first day. I was
overdressed and wearing nice shoes and walked in and got yelled at. Not for
being overdressed but because no one walks around the inside of buildings (even
schools I guess) in hard soled shoes. So my nice leather dress shoes were
replaced with sandals. I was dressed to the nines and then wearing flip-flops.
My plastic sandals at home for the bathroom and the
laundry room (both are always wet) are girls’. They have flowers on them. And
glitter. But I don’t have my own pair yet so I wear them. My bedding is also
all pink. Pink sheets, pink duvet, pink fuzzy blankets. A girl lived here
before me and left it all. She also left noodles in the cabinet. I’m eating
them now since they’re easy to make.
There’s free lunch and a snack each day at the school.
And Canada and Australia took me out for dinner my first day here. I
don’t have a clue what I’m eating but I just stick it in my mouth and hope it’s
edible. So far it has been. But Koreans are big on spiciness. I don’t mind it.
But it seems like they replace actual flavor with spice. Or maybe the spice is just
so overpowering to me that I miss the flavor. I eat it anyway and pretend my
mouth doesn't hurt.
I keep doing sleep math. I figure 8 hours of sleep and
now it’s 10 so I’d be getting up at 6 if I went to bed now like I want but 6 is
too early so I’ll power through to 11 because 7 is too early but at least it’s not 6.
Being white, I get
all sorts of free stuff when I buy from vendors. Not in major stores, but
there are farmers’ markets and street vendors selling fruit or vegetables. We
went to a farmers’ market today and I got some popcorn and the others got popped rice and popped wheat grains. I didn't know they popped anything but
corn. The guy came up and gave us a free puffed rice patty. It was like
eating sweetly flavored air.
I told you how there’s a greeting “Have you eaten
(breakfast/lunch/dinner)?” yeah? Well when I asked a Korean teacher about it
she said theirs is a culture that likes to make sure you’re fed. At the time, I
thought okay, makes sense, nothing weird there. But today we had a field trip
to Independence Hall which is really just an open garden and walkway area. At
lunch, Director Lee (the husband of the husband-and-wife director duo) kept
insisting we eat more and more. I was already full then he opened up a foil and
revealed more kimbap (these spellings are approximate). And he kept making
everyone eat and it’s rude to turn things down and we couldn't pretend to eat
and then hide it because he was sitting right there. I probably ate twice as
much as I normally would in America. And then kids kept bringing snacks over
for us because on field trips parents pack snacks for their kids in addition to
the school provided lunch.
Director Lee is a chubby guy. Short, round without being
American obese but he’s probably one of the bigger guys I’ve seen in Korea. He
understands English better than he speaks it and he speaks it slow and happily.
I’ll have to do my impression if we ever voice chat. One of the first things
he said to me in the car when I got here was “I like baseball” and it was the
funniest thing ever which is why I have to do an impression because just the
words aren't funny but his whole demeanor doing it was. He’s just the happiest
guy in the world when it comes to baseball. Anyway, I've had a few car rides
with him because he and his wife, Katherine, are helping me with the final
steps towards Korean immigration (health check, going to the immigration
office, getting a foreigner’s card, bank account, cell phone, etc.). And it’s
always a little awkward because I don’t know what to say to people in general
but for him I have to simplify every question to its essence like, “Hot here, not
hot Illinois” even though that’s not entirely true but it’s not AS hot but he
always misses the little words so might as well be a bit inaccurate so he’ll
understand. But he asks questions and I answer and try to ask questions and
generally I thought I was boring him or being rude by not constantly talking.
But today on the field trip, he asked me if I exercised. I said yeah. He asked
how often. I said four or five times a week, but being indecisive like that
confuses him so I settled on five times a week. I told him I run, hike on the
mountain, do push-ups. And all of those are true but maybe exaggerated in his
head. He seemed to think I did them all at once and for extended periods when
really it’s like 10 minutes in the morning or night. He’s on a health kick so
he asked me to go hiking with him in the morning. So now at 7 am each Monday,
Wednesday, Friday, we’re going hiking on the mountain behind my apartment. I
guess this means he likes me, which is good. Maybe he just likes me because I’m
from America and he likes America.
So Independence Hall has some historical significance. I don't know it. It’s beautiful and clean and there are a few military men walking around.
There’s a forested mountain rising in the background and the ground is all brick
with dirt patches for trees and ponds and fountains and monuments and plaques
in Korean. There’s a lot to do there for kids and adults. Kids can dress up as
soldiers and play with toy guns. There’s just a general tour about the history
of it. A lot of schools and tourists go there and it’s so big that it’s the
least crowded place in Korea. But instead of doing any of that fun and
educational stuff, we sat at picnic tables and the kids made signs for their
rooms that spelled their names in wood. Twigs and little wooden buttons made
from sticks cut cross-section. That took half an hour and the rest of the time
was lunch and the kids playing tag. Then at the end we took a photo with a
fountain and pond and the mountain in the backdrop so it looked like the field
trip was somehow educational. And the kids didn't even make the signs, really.
Really, the Korean teachers did all the work for them while the kids sat on
their laps.
There’s a kid, Jerry, who is in Dolphin class. I teach
the class for a half hour in the mornings to do musical. Normally Australia teacher has them though. They’re second-year kindergartners. But
Jerry is stubborn about everything. For musical, he’ll just stick out his
tongue the whole time and not sing or dance. Teachers just give him the
smallest part because then he only has to say a few lines. And when he says
them, he just spits them out at once, no pause for breaths or periods or
anything. It’s like “Nursetakehimtothehospitalnow” and then he goes back to sticking
his tongue out. Even during performances, I’m told. Our next one is Tuesday.
This Tuesday or next, I forget. I have two classes doing musicals. Anyway during
the picture at Independence Hall, Jerry just walks off. He was like “NOPE! Not
doing this anymore!” They had already taken one or two to get the best picture
but wanted a few more so everyone’s eyes were open, but he just takes off. And
no amount of Korean or English instruction to get back in line would make him
listen. It was pretty funny. He’s Canada's favorite because he’s
so free-willed. It is pretty funny when you’re not in charge of him.
Joyce-teacher is the Korean teacher that helps me with my
kindergarten class, Pink class. So is Silvia-teacher but she floats between
classes. Both are Korean, don’t let the Western names fool you. She was telling
me a little about each kid and the cuss words in Korean. Like “dongu” means
shit ass and “pongo” means ass. And “pangu” means you fall. And all the kids
say these words and the teachers don’t seem to care so I don’t know if cussing
just isn't a big deal in their language but no kid knows or says any English
cuss words.
My class has first-year kindergarten. They go for two or
three years and this is their only school. The other classes are the second and
third years. One of the boys in my class, when he speaks Korean, he always
starts with “ani” which means like “By the way” so it’s funny to tease him with
it. And his last teacher was a woman and because of how they learn the language,
through repetition mostly, he talks like a girl. And his laugh makes him seem
legitimately screwed up. It’s like a seal’s bark only quieter and more airy. I’ll
have to do an impression because words can’t do it
justice. Also when all the kids talk they end every word in –yo, which is just
a silly, friendly way of talking in Korean, but they do it in English too. So
it’s like “Bonnie-yo! How is the weather yo? What are you doing-yo?” And
sometimes it’s its own word and others it’s attached to the word before. I had
no clue why they did it until Joyce-teacher told me.
Silvia-teacher has a son at our school who I have in my
middle school class, but he’s only an elementary student but advanced because
his mom’s an English teacher. So on Wednesdays when the middle-schoolers have exam
prep, I just sit and chat with him. I've only done it once though. He’s a shy
kid but he’s fun to talk to and he understands English well, but he’s slow to
speak it. I think it’s because he’s not too confident in himself but once he
gets going, he’s great. But on Wednesday, I was just being casual with him
while we did a speaking activity. There was a script of questions I’d ask him
and then he’d respond to each and then we’d switch and he’d ask and I’d
respond. But I was going off script when I asked him because the questions were
awkward English. “What was the most expensive gift you've ever received? What
was the occasion that you received this gift? How did it make you feel to
receive this gift?” blah, blah, blah (that’s an English phrase Koreans love.
Maybe I’ll teach them yadda yadda yadda next). Anyway, I was answering his
questions and I thought we had a good rapport going and that he was going off-book.
He asked “What was the most expensive gift you’ve ever received?” and I told
him about my first car. He seemed interested so I just kept telling him about
it and then he asked something and I thought he was getting friendly and
opening up and going off-script. I thought he asked “What was it like?” but he
actually asked in broken English “What was the price?” which was a scripted question. But after we kept
talking, he did open up. He loves baseball. I asked him about his favorite team
and he said some Korean team and I asked if they were any good this year and he
said no so I told him it was okay because I like the Chicago Cubs and they
always suck. But I've told people so many different teams that if they ever
talk to each other, I’m going to be caught in a lot of lies.
I don’t mean to lie. I’m not like maliciously planning
these string of lies. Really I’m not! There’s no point to them except I’m
awkward and I open my mouth and words just come out and sometimes they’re lies.
They’re good answers for whatever I’m asked, but they’re complete fiction.
Other than baseball, coffee is huge here. Korean teachers
always come in with Starbucks cups. The Venti ones too. In America, we like to
joke that big cities have a Starbucks on every corner. That’s not even an
exaggeration for here. Maybe not Starbucks but they have 5 coffee shops within
a five minute walk from here—and this is a residential area! Think of like the
more downtown urban areas. They must just be rows and rows of coffee shops, all
crowded I’m sure. So at lunch today on the field trip, instead of water or
juice or even milk, they served cold coffee. It was mild though so I could
stomach it. It was like caffeinated chocolate milk. I haven’t had any caffeine
or soda since my trip here so 10 days. Now I’m a bit jittery and still have my
afternoon classes to teach. I’m on my lunch break typing this since I already
ate three or four lunches.
Tomorrow is the weekend. Today’s Friday. People keep
asking me about my plans but how can I plan anything when I don’t have internet
and don’t speak the language? Either I tag along with people or just walk
around. If I had Google maps, I could find stores I wanted to go to but just
walking around I don’t know where the stores are and I can’t just poke my head
in and muddle through some Konglish to see if they sell anything I might be
interested in. And I can’t plan trips to like Seoul or wherever because I don’t
know the bus schedule or where the bus terminal is or anything. Not having
internet is awful. I’ve been playing Hearts and Free Cell and Chess and I suck
at all of them. I was playing some games that I bought through Steam (a
downloadable-games seller that’s online but you download them to your computer)
but apparently if I’m not online for a week, the system shuts down and I can’t
play any of those games! HJHIAWRNSJKFDGAM what is this?! And every day,
Katherine asks me “Is your internet working?” and I tell her no and then she
comes back the next day with an excuse like “Your apartment was empty for a
long time so they just need to open it again and it should be working tonight.” I don’t blame her but it’s frustrating. I
don’t even know where an electronics store is to buy like a router or new Ethernet
cable to see if that’d fix my problem or if it really is the room’s internet
isn't turned on yet. Let’s hope my weekend improves with the addition of the
internet.
Mostly I sleep to pass the time.
I don’t even know my address here!
A man is coming Monday to fix everything. I hope he works
miracles. These games are getting old.
Hearts is mostly a game about screwing over the other
guy. Do you play? There’s 4 people and each person gets 13 cards. At the
beginning of the hand, you pass three cards to your neighbor (it changes for
each hand). You start with the 2 of clubs and everyone has to play a club. If
you don’t have a club, you play another suit. Whoever has plays the highest
card of the original suit (aces high), gets all the cards in their discard pile and chooses the next
suit to play. Starting on Turn 2, if you don’t have a card in the played suit,
you can play a heart. For every heart in your discard pile, you get a point.
But there’s also a queen of spades worth 13 points. I call her The Bitch. In
the beginning, you can pass on The Bitch or hang onto her, but if you hang onto
her, she’s a ticking time bomb and can screw you over. I like to imagine the
computer players are old biddies cackling when they screw me. They do it a lot.
They always know when I have The Bitch and so they play spade after spade until
I’m forced to play The Bitch and because she’s a high card, I always end up
taking her back. Or in the beginning, I always get her. I either get dealt The
Bitch or The Bitch is passed to me. If I get her and pass her on, I only
remember having her at one point so I don’t worry about her like she’s been
played but she hasn't and she always comes back to screw me. But when I unleash
The Bitch at just the right moment, it’s more satisfying than ice cream. I yell
“Fuck you, bitches!” to the old lady computer players. Talking to you would be
more satisfying though.
I don’t even have music! I have about 10 songs, 8 of
which are from a video game and it’s all orchestral music which is nice but
gets old after 20 playthroughs. One is Anne Hathaway rapping too. Which is
still lovely. As lovely as a Lil Wayne-style rap can be. I miss Spotify and
Pandora and YouTube.
I found a treasure of another song in my recycling bin. I
think I deleted it because it was a free version given out by the artist but
it’s very quiet. It’s a good song but maybe I just think that because I’m out
of other songs. In one day, I've exhausted my music. But I still like these
lyrics “I’d say I've reached that time I know my trade. I know how to care for
my guitar and I know how to get it played. I’m comfortable. I sleep on the
floor. Played a fair few shows, gonna play more. All along the while, I was
just trying to make you smile.” It’s Frank Turner. I’ll be happy to listen to
his other songs when I get internet. That seems to be a theme here.
I’m learning to use chopsticks. Ramen is about 800 won or
60 cents for a meal. I could live off 10 dollars a week. There’s some
comforting about that. I always prepare the lower limits of my budget so I know
what I can sink to and still manage to survive. But eventually I’ll go to
McDonald's as a nice reminder of home. There’s also a Taco Bell in Seoul.
My first night, during the bus terminal fiasco, I tried
calling the agent who placed me at the school and she didn't answer but she
called me back that night and apologized. She also said next time I’m in Seoul
we should get a drink together. I like to think she was hitting on me.
I’m learning to use chopsticks. While so far, things are
pretty good, I’m a worrier and reading Life
of Pi and The Road have been big comforts to me. They survived in horrid
conditions. Surely I can survive in Korea teaching a bunch of kids for a year.
Still, it’d be nice to have internet! Have you read Life of Pi for a second
time? After the ending (a great one!), I thought it might lose some of its
appeal but it really is the story that makes the book and the end is just a
bonus. For me anyway.
I just made a second bowl of ramen. The first bowl had
vegetables on the front. Onions, peppers, greens, etc but inside there was
meat. I didn't think anything of that till this second bowl. The front has meat
on it. It looks like a mini-burger actually. But the bowl has no meat. It’s all
vegetables! And some weird acorn tofu. They served it at lunch one day
and…it…no, I can’t. It was like Jell-O but brown and tasted like the dirt a
squirrel might bury an acorn in. It’s a health food here though so they’re not
concerned with the taste.
Every meal there’s kimchi. It’s pickled cabbage that’s
spicy and orange from the sauce. I’m very messy with it. I drip it on
everything. I hope to get better with the chopsticks so I’m not so messy.
Wooden chopsticks are easier than metal. Their rough edge gives just enough
friction to keep my food from slipping out. They also eat a lot of kimbap here
which is seaweed wrapped around rice packed around an assortment of bits of
food: egg, ham, cucumber, lobster. It seems like whatever they find they toss
in the middle.
We went to Magoksa Temple which is the most famous
Buddhist temple in Korea. This one was about 40 minutes away by car. There’s
another one nearby that’s really old but no one cares for it. Director Lee
explained it “World famous must have entrance fee. Other temple, no entrance
fee, no famous.”
The temples had been repainted. The designs were
intricate and I’ll show you pictures but they weren’t huge or overly impressive
but the land around it was. It was a peaceful walk through the woods. There
were rolling hills covered in trees that reminded me of The Ozarks, but they
were more dramatic. They probably weren't much bigger than the hills in The
Ozarks but the context was more staggering. The Ozarks are riddled with hill.
Hill into next hill, never sloping to the base level except where the rivers
cut through it. But here, the hills end and there are some flatlands then
suddenly another hill rises up. It was wonderful to drive to, too. Have you
ever noticed how things in the distance turn blue? Why is that? The road was far
enough that the hills were just turning blue.
The traditional center, where they had education and pamphlets on temple stays if you want to live like a monk for a bit, was very
modern. It was a funny irony that in the midst of beautiful, natural landscape
that had been preserved for the monks that still live there and to keep in
contact with nature the tradition center was incredibly modern. They also had a gym for the monks.
I missed the flowering season by a month or so. I guess
it’s real pretty. Even trees along the streets flower. There are festivals for
cherry blossom but the festival was too early and the trees hadn’t bloomed yet.
Korea has a lot of festivals. There’s a mud festival in July. I don’t know what
a mud festival entails though.
We had bugogi after the hike through the woods around the
temples. Bu – “fire” gogi – “meat.” It was barbecue. Expensive for here ($15 a person) but a table big
enough for 6 was covered with dishes. The barbecue was brought out then they
brought out what you’d dip the pork in, then they brought stone rice pots and
lettuce. You took the lettuce in hand and put rice and pork on it then you’d
add in whatever else you wanted. Onions, fiddleheads, anchovies, peppers, etc. Canada tried to get Australia to try this pepper
telling him it was spicy but since Australia liked spicy food, even spicy by
Korean standards which is ridiculously hot, he’d probably be fine. And Australia thought Canada was tricking him. So I volunteered to try it and Canada broke his ruse to warn me
not to because he saw my face after the spicy kimbap the other day and he knew
I wouldn't be able to handle it. I tried it anyway. He was right. At first, it
wasn't spicy. But he told me to let it mingle like party guests and apparently
everyone got into a huge argument and took out guns and started shooting each
other because after about five seconds my mouth was in hell. It lasted a good
five, ten minutes. Water didn't help. Rice didn't help. Eating other food that
was even slightly spicy made it flare up again. My nose ran. I cried. I turned
red and coughed. Canada had some too and he felt the same. He said he almost
threw up. Australia had to eat two pieces to feel a little bit of spice. Screw
him.
I've got to be the cashier’s nightmare. I don’t even know
how to function in American society when it comes to these public settings like
buying groceries. What do I say? Do I bother getting exact change? Do I bother
with cash? Do I look them in the eye? Do I tell them have a nice day even
though they’re 43 with two kids working for minimum wage where the uniform is a
blue vest with a giant yellow smiley face pinned to it? But in Korea, it’s even
worse! I don’t speak the language! Yet. I have to keep saying yet or I’ll never
learn. But today, the monitor wouldn't work so I couldn't see the price. And I
bought more groceries than I did last time and different ones so I didn't have
a rough estimate. I just started pulling out money as she’s fiddling with the
monitor trying to get it to display a price and finally I handed her 30,000 won
and hoped it was enough and it was. I need to learn the language. I don’t even
know what to do with the cart or basket when I’m done with it. I just left the
basket on the conveyor belt and hoped she’d take care of it. I saw a stack
behind her and figured maybe that’s what they were from. Then after I paid, I
realized I hadn't asked for a bag. A bag costs like 50 won, nothing at all
really. But I had already paid. So I start grabbing my stuff: two bowls of
ramen, two bags of chips, chocolate chip cookies, orange juice, water, and
sausages. It was a real balancing act to make it home without dropping anything
and a wrist workout because I carried the two 3-liter drinks in one hand
between my fingers. Luckily my building is literally 10 seconds from the
grocery center. It’s across the street. And I’m only on the third floor so
that’s another 30 seconds at most. But getting in the door of the apartment was
a miracle.
How do you measure floors around the world? Is it ground floor, first,
second, third, etc? Or first, second, third? Here they do it first, second,
third like we do in America. They copy America in most ways. Even the cereal is
the same, save for Korean letters. They say Z as “zee” here, not “zed” too.
That’s nice.
So I wanted pizza today but they do pizza weird here.
It’s topped with sticky, sweet sauce and there’s little cheese and it’s very
messy and they put corn and shrimp on it. It doesn’t taste bad but it’s not
like pizza. But apparently you can order regular pizza too. I don’t know where
the nearest pizza place is though. I found one but it was closed when I walked
by. And while walking, trying to find stray wifi to check my email and Facebook
and such, I saw a pizza delivery bike. Nothing too strange about that. It was
Pizza Hut which I didn't know they had here but still, not too weird. The
delivery guys zip through the streets and you have to be careful when crossing
because they’d probably hit you. They swerve around cars that most people would
break for and they go between the lanes filled with cars. They’re real
daredevils. But also on that walk, I saw a McDonald’s delivery guy! What!?
You’d think America would have that. If only I knew the number…
They don’t tip here. And barbershops are cheap, about $5.
But I saw one beauty salon that was multi-story and the school is in a
multi-story Starbucks but they only serve coffee on the first floor and we’re
on the second so I figured the beauty salon was like that—one story per
business. Nope. I saw in the glass window and there were women with their hair
drying in the windows of the first and second floors. I couldn’t see the upper
floors though.
There was a party on Wednesday the 26th of June. It was a welcome party for me. Sue-teacher barked at me in Korean. It was friendly hazing. Lucy-teacher was my life-line since she didn't drink much and just generally takes pity on me and helps.
Silvia-teacher made me do the moonwalk. I can't refuse anyone and she's like a mother-figure, very stern and you have to listen. So I got up. Then she called everyone at the back table to watch me as I dance. I told her "Hush! Don't put more eyes on me!" And she said "Okay, okay, everyone forget it, go back to your meal and conversation." Then I get ready again and she gathers their attention again. "Everyone now! Watch!" She's very funny.
Michelle-teacher was chanting "Nor ray hey!" which is Korean for "Singand embarrass yourself" and she'd chant it at someone and they'd try and pass the buck to someone else and it eventually got passed around the table without anyone singing but it never actually landed on Michelle-teacher. She's an instigator.
The party was on Cook-teachers roof. She's a very rich woman and owns two apartment complexes. She's not actually a teacher, but she is a cook. I don't know why she's working at the school if she's rich. She grew everything we ate on that roof, except the meat which was purchased in the butcher shop on the first floor.
We had bugogi again with the lettuce wraps and all 300 dishes of condiments. I saw those green peppers too. The spicy ones that made me cry. Sue-teacher made a wrap for Canada and then started on one for me. I watched her. She picked up those green peppers. She handed the wrap to me to eat. I was weary. "Is it spicy?"
"No. Don't you trust me?"
"I don't know."
She looked hurt. I ate it after some psyching up. It wasn't spicy. I should've trusted her. If she ever makes me another, I bet she'll fill it with dirt.
